Just F-ing Google It!

“If it isn’t on Google, it doesn’t exist” Jimmy Wales

Just F-ing Google It!

If you are unsure
On finding the allure
As to why, what and who
If you are in doubt
Of where, how and when
Knowing all about
The sword being mightier
Than the pen
Your head is none the lighter
But you might get wiser
The oracle
Oh, no, not the database
Get onto the next phase
Before you ask
More stupid questions
Or hand out any suggestions
Take upon yourself the task
And just fucking Google it!


More, Please!

“Please, sir, I want some more” Charles Dickens, Oliver Twist

More, Please

I hate it!
Yes please

It’s disgusting and vile!
Yes please

This tastes really bad!
Yes please

I don’t like this series!
Yes please

I have no fondness for this type of activity!
Yes please

I am getting too old for this shit!
Yes please

The flavour of this coffee is more like tar!
Yes please

I have too many shoes already!
Yes please

Life sucks!
Yes please


Fixing It

“When I told my doctor I couldn’t afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays” Henny Youngman

Fixing It

The day has arrived
In three months’ time
Finally going under the knife
Oh what a life
Facing the surgeon
Guess it was urgent
After all
This time spent
In the end
Hasn’t been a ball
Not a fan of hospitals, needles or blood
It’s such a crud
But not being in control
Is the worst of all
Lying unconscious
Body and mind
Out of commission
Please be kind
Without condition
Wish me luck
Let’s hope the doctors
Won’t fuck it up!



“A lot of us think we’re invincible… but we have to start putting ourselves on the to-do list” Giuliana Rancic


The name suggested
A battle maiden invested
Always the strong one
Getting everything done
Relying on strength
Taking great lengths
Never cheating
Always completing

Out of the blue
Without a clue
When least expected
The unthinkable was inflicted
The temple of strength failed
And came tumbling down
Feeling jailed
Oh treacherous one

Completely helpless
Not the fearless
Never been so afraid
Beginning to fade
Sometimes going insane
From all that pain

Going through stages
In quite the rages
Denial, anger, bargain, depression
With each session
Looking for that quick fix
Throwing in the mix
Ideas of the radical
Forgoing the medical
With a scoff
Thinking on just walking it off

Final stage at hand
Taking the stand
Waving the white flag
No more snags
Feeling revived
Acceptance had arrived