Tales of the Unexpected (or what ever floats in my mind)! Part One

“Every writer I know has trouble writing” Joseph Heller

Tales of the Unexpected (or what ever floats in my mind)! Part One

“This written tale is based on the prompt:”Four-hundred words. One at a time. Go.”

I woke up, when I was born, no sooner, no later. That was as stupid an opening line as “Once upon a time” or “It was a cold and rainy night”, but I thought I was being clever in starting the tale with a joke. You who follow my writing may have noticed the humouristic twist in most tales, at least at some point. For the life of me, I cannot write serious, not matter how I try. Maybe I would have a career in joke writing or scetches for “Saturday Night Live” or similar shows.

OK, so the agreed process for this tale is: Absolutely no censorship in this tale, my mind freely flowing as my fingers do the typing. I am no longer in command of this vessel. What ever is written on these pages is purely fictional as produced by the army of voices living in my head. I was thinking of cheating of course, thinking before writing, plotting my way into this tale.

After emerging from the deep state I was in, I decided to finally let go, to leave it alone, to not think too much and see what will develop. Apart from the typos caused by my fingers not being able to keep up, this is all just a flow of the mind. I know it is crowded in there, despite the fact the sign implies there is “room for rent”. My occupants like to play tricks on me and those who might take a glimpse to my brain.

Funny things those renters of mine. I prefer to use that word rather than thinking this is a permanent situation. I do hope, that, at some point the other voices will take their leave and I can finally make decisions on my own. Whether that be writing or something else. Mostly it is writing though. When I do decide to let go, the writing is usually good, so I really shouldn’t be taking any credit. But someone once said, A good writer borrows, a great writer steals.

Oh, oh, I am stuck now, either the others went on a break or then they are all napping. I am actually wondering how familiar and TV-oriented this sounds. I do sound like a Borg drone from Star Trek, don’t I. “I can’t hear the others, I need the others to survive!” must be the most quoted line in the franchise when the Borg characters are in play.

But I digest, I mean digress ;P

Flow of mind or the lack there of. A while back I wrote a funny note on my mind having too many tabs open. Oddly enough, that was not fiction but fact. I do like to dabble more on the fiction than the fact side, never getting too personal, but I have a warm feeling inside of me. Guess I am safe as long as it doesn’t run down my legs! But so far so good.

So, back to fact or fiction, was that what I was talking about? No, it was the thing of too many things occupying the brain at one point, hence the tabs and open thing. OK, back on track. So yes. That actually has a link to the ever so talked about writer’s block. The only blockage I have or have had for the past fifty odd years is or was the fact that I do censor myself, a lot. I have so many ideas, causing my mind to overflow.

Currently, as I started my writing life for the third and hopefully charmed time, I will let myself write what ever I want, who ever I want and where ever I want. Sans all the self doubt, drama and excuses. Oh my! Now I am finally getting serious! I actually got a little serious there a day or so back when I poured my heart and thoughts to a few darker poems. I admit I use humour as a cover and rather than dwelling on real life issues, I crack a joke.

I freely admit to the following personality traits: I am sarcastic, pessimistic, I have a warped sense of humour, I am spontaneous yet conscious, I am lazy, but also industrious, at least when work is concerned, personal life not so much. So now you know. I like to hide but remain right in the open. I talk a lot, but say nothing.

Back to the topic again, (I seem to be loosing the track now constantly), what ever that was, I actually forgot at this point. Oh yes, free flow of the mind. So not a jogy, not a Vulcan, not logical, just your average everyday humanoid being. So that is my life story or sort of story. At least what I came up with today. I guess this is more than four hundred words. I don’t know how much of myself I have revealed in this little mind tale, but read between the lines or over the lines. Somewhere there, between, lies the truth.

something

More Tales of the Unexpected

Rocket Science? It’s Just Life!

“What I do is not rocket science, but I sure do love it” Kyle Chandler

Rocket Science? It’s Just Life!

Life

Is complicated
Feelings of hate
It challenges you
It teases you

Makes you feel very small
The elating, making you tall
Pushing you against the wall
Even if you wanted to just go to the mall

You are so confused
With feelings of being abused
Left out standing in the cold
Cheated of everything and very old

It’s more like science
Than any kind of common sense
How to break the fence
Find the formula of suspense

Remember this one thing
And it can make you sing

It’s only complicated
If you are acting stupid
It’s not rocket science
It’s just life with a little defiance

rocket

Mirror, Mirror

“Before you judge me, my actions or my ways, just take a good look in the mirror because honey, you ain’t perfect”

Mirror, Mirror

Mirror Mirror
On the wall
Who is the bitchiest
Of them all?

You say attitude
I say personality
Just because
I piss you off

Mirror Mirror
On the wall
Who is the smartest
Of them all?

I may play dumb
Or a lazy bum
But there within lies the fun
Always thinking like
The fastest gun

Mirror Mirror
On the wall
Is it my reflection
Or a deception?

It is myself I see
Even if thee
Don’t agree

It’s always going to be
Just me
In the
Mirror, Mirror

mirror

The Truth Is Out There

“Look up at the stars and not down at your feet. Try to make sense of what you see, and wonder about what makes the universe exist. Be curious.” Stephen Hawking

The Truth Is Out There

In
My Mind

Science Fiction
Science Fact
Utopia

The Earth
The Planets
The Stars

In
My Mind

A Galaxy
The Milky Way
The Cosmos

The Universe
The Intergalactic Space
A Void

In
My Mind

A Wormhole
A Black hole
A Singularity

Pi
A mathematical constant
The number 47
A mystery

In
My Mind

Spiraling
With random thoughts
With coherent thoughts

Universes and Worlds
Conjured up and destroyed

In
My Mind

Aliens and
Their spaceships

Humans with
Their flying machines

In the Here
And Now

I am
Peddling
On my Bicycle
The long dark road
A head of Me

believe

I’m not Evil, I was just Drawn That Way

“Evil is a point of view” Anne Rice

I’m not Evil, I was just Drawn That Way

A Woman
Can be
Many things

Curvy
Feminine
Sexy

Calculating
Manipulative
Evil

Promiscuous
Slutty
Trollopy

A Woman is also

A

Mother
Sister
Wife

Lady
Dame
Queen

Treat her right
A woman can be

Giving
Loving
Romantic

And forever Yours

evil

Star Trek Wars

“Resistance is futile” The Borg

Star Trek Wars

We had finally arrived at the annual Star Trek convention. Our little gang of geeks, all dressed up in their favourite character’s uniforms. Myself as Mr Spock of course, the half human, half Vulcan science officer from the original Star Trek show.

Some of us had been eagerly been awaiting to hit the shopping booths to find new collectibles for their already vast collections. We were scanning the area for familiar faces and hoping to hook up with some of our friends while here.

“Don’t venture too far!” I ordered the others, “The panel is about to begin in two hours and we want front row seats!” I shouted after my team who had already made their ways around the surrounding shopping area.

The one portraying the Captain’s character was far too reckless, not to mention air headed, to lead anyone, let alone herself. So for now, despite the fact of being the first officer in rank, the dubious task of leadership of this ragtag crew had fallen onto me.

I noticed some of our friends a little further and waved at them. They were dressed as Klingons and during the conventions, they were always in full character, speaking nothing but Klingon. Luckily I had mastered the language myself. Let’s just say the conversation with them was, interesting, at best.

***

It was nearly time for the first panel of the day, guest starring one of my favourite actors, William Shatner. Due to my diligence, we had managed to get the front row seats and were now eagerly awaiting for the mighty Shatner to arrive. My crew and I had a few questions for him and if luck would serve us, we would get the opportunity to present them for him.

“Oh. My. God!” ‘Uhura’ was over excited when she joined us finally.

“What?” I asked her.

“You will never guess what I just heard at the juice bar?” She continued.

“Spit it out already!” I was getting anxious.

“Well, the word out there is, that there is a heard of Star Wars fans dressed in Stormtroopers uniforms coming to the convention.” Uhura told us.

“This convention? Our convention? The STAR TREK convention?!” For a Vulcan, my pitch was overly high and my emotions up the roof.

“Yeah and they are led by none other than Darth Vader himself!” She added knowingly.

“When is this supposed to happen?” I asked her, hoping she had better intel than just rumours or gossip.

“Not sure, but I heard this from a reliable source!” She ensured me.

“I need details people! Go and get some proper intel, we still have thirty minutes to go!” I was ordering my crew, who were looking at me like I had lost it, but did as I told them anyway.

After they had left I sat down in defeat and said to myself, “I cannot work like this!” holding my head in my hands feeling a massive migraine coming on.

A little later they returned and confirmed what Uhura had told earlier. The general consensus was, that a group of Star Wars fans were about to invade the convention, but as to when was still uncertain.
We all agreed to keep our eyes and ears open. But for now, concentrate on more urgent matters, such as the panel led by William Shatner.

***

Some fifteen minutes into the panel, where the boring questions were done with, the fans were gearing up for more interesting topics and our turn was coming up soon, it happened.

A character dressed in a black uniform, complete with a cape and helmet and accompanied by roughly twenty odd people dressed in all white plastic uniforms, charged in front.

“Vader!” I stood up from my seat and pounced to the direction where the perpetrators had made their stance.

“Die Trekkies, die!” Darth Vader breathed through his mask and was ready to charge.

“We prefer Trekkers!” I shouted as I charged towards the enemy with full force, my crew not far behind and the other conventionalists joining.

“What ever!” Vader shouted back.

A wrestling match of sorts started, each side showing and pushing each other.

One of the troopers had charged to the stage and managed to bump into Mr Shatner, before he had been able to escape the competitive fan uprising. Our crew was the first to respond to the distress and our resident crew member, the Doctor reached Mr Shatner first. Shatner was laying on the floor, holding his head. The Doctor checked his pulse, then looked at us and back at Shatner again and said:

“You’re dead Jim!”

Mr Shatner looked at him and rolled his eyes: “Right!” Was all he told the smirking ‘Doctor’.

“Are you alright Mr Shatner?” I asked concerned.

“I will be, as soon as I get out from this,” He was waving towards the crowd, “Madness!”

After helping Shatner up and guiding him towards the exit, I and the Doctor joined the rest of our crew, returning to the battle field.

Today is a good day to die!” One of the troopers shouted.

“Hey, that line is from our franchise!” The Doctor from our group responded.

“Yeah! Get your own lines!” Another Trekker added.

And with our faux phasers and light sabers, the Trekkers and the Star Wars fans continued their age long battle, to the proverbial death!

***

Later, sitting confined in one of the empty conference halls, after getting arrested, the bulk of the fans on either side, some three hundred of us in total. No one was saying much. I was also regretting loosing myself and my Vulcan ways engaging in battle rather than trying to solve the issue with logic and peaceful negotiation.

Guess the lesson learnt here is, no matter the franchise or belief, there is always room for all kinds of fandoms and each of us should respect each others’ choices.

trek wars

The Nerd In Me

“Never apologize for being nerdy, because unnerdy people never apologize for being assholes”
John Barrowman

The Nerd In Me

My Glasses,
A band-aid as quick fix
My Teeth
Dental braces for the glitches

I am awkward
Sometimes scared
A social coward
Of everything
and everyone

Over analyzing
Constantly thinking

But
I am also

Stalking you
Admiring you
Too Afraid
to approach you

Standing in the narrow corridor
Staring in awe
From a far
There you are

Suddenly
Walking towards me
I try to hide
No place to run
No where to flee

As you approach
I try to look away
Hoping you won’t notice me
Standing there
I feel the need to pee

Panic attacks
Breath caught
Eyes scanning
Nothing in planning
I am caught

I hear
“There you are!”

Not a word
Escapes my mouth
Standing there
Staring in silence

“Hello”
You say

“Hel- lo”
I try

Stepping closer
No hesitation
You say

“Just kiss me already!”

nerd

Stalking is such a Strong Word. Let’s call it… Social Research!

” *Friend request accepted* Let the stalking begin! “

Stalking is such a Strong Word. Let’s call it… Social Research!

Checking your home page
For the umpteenth time
I must have been in a haste
For no updates I find

Just because
My favourites
Are in the ‘Ks’
And my followers
Are in the nays

You may think
I stink
And am
A

Stalker?
Prowler?
Fan Girl?
Just because my toes curl?

Admirer maybe
From a far of course
Devote
And the Art to endorse
Buff or a Rooter
But not a suitor

I hope you are not offended
As I await here expended
And I’d rather
You called me an other

Name,
Without the blame

A
Researcher
of the Individual

Now,
Why did you not
Answer on the spot
To my ping?

social

Serially Found

“Maybe I’m a serial regional writer. First here, then there, across the map”
Richard Ford

Serially Found

There is just
something about you
I am in lust
And only for you

I am finding it impossible
to stay away
Highly improbable
Anything would keep me at bay

I lost you
Luckily
I found you

My little bit of Heaven
By sweet sweet
I am up to seven
My one and only treat

My sweet chocolate bar
In a serial package
You didn’t venture too far
When I was tracking

serially

Related posts:

Serially Lost in Fiction

Reality? Who’s Brilliant Idea Was That?

Simply, Weird

“I’m not even on drugs, I am just weird” Alex Gaskarth

Simply, Weird

Bizarre
Curious
Eerie

Highly Extraordinary

Mismatched
Odd
Peculiar

Still Familiar

Scratchy
Sinful
Strange

Only Natural

Queer
Unusual
Uncanny

Seriously Virtuous

Unearthly
Weird
Whacked

Still, very very Wicked

Or am I simply,
A Special Edition?

weird