The Gun Rap

VERSATILE BLOGGER AWARD:  Featuring the Gun Rap

Put your “bass beat” on for this one!

“When in Rhyme do as the Rhymers do”

The Gun Rap

My name is Gun
I am a lot of fun
Some call me ‘Nilla
I am here to chilla

Here are some facts
Seven to be exact
Guess that is the most
You’ll find about this host

I am a wannabe writer
And maybe a little brighter
Than you might think
While you let that sink

I will continue my rant
In the form of this chant
Even though I really can’t
Sing, dance or ant?

“What? Ant? That is not a verb!”
“I was trying to rhyme -erb”
“If you can’t rhyme, stay out of the kitchen”
“Why are you so bitchen?”
“Enough with the rhyme!”
“Fine! Now gimme a dime and lets get back to the rap!”

The three letters
Best defining my efforts
Photography, Poetry
And P…

“Oops, can’t say that out loud on television <smirks>!”
“We’re not on television! This is a written blog you dumbass!”
“Hey, you said ass! That is mighty sass of you!”
“Argh! I give up!”
“Great, now back to the rap!”

Well, the last of the three
Is for me to know and for thee
To find out
Oh, do not pout!

I am a non-smoker
And I like to play poker
No just kidding
Seemed more fitting

Now to end this rap
I had to fill the gap
And already told you more
Than I intended for

Word!

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The Gun Roswell Show

“Think, write, read, delete, repeat. Re-think, re-write, skip read, hit send” Gun Roswell

The Gun Roswell Show

(Sung into the tune of Itchy and Scratchy theme from the Simpson’s)

I type and write
I type and write and type

Type type type
Write write write

With the occasional click and shutter sound, when out walking in the sun…

Type type type
Write write write

This is the Gun Roswell show!

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Coffee made me do it!

“Black as night, sweet as sin” Neil Gaiman

Coffee made me do it!

Today I went off the edge
I didn’t even take a pledge
I pranced around like a Fred Astaire
The others looking with a stare
Laughing out very loud
And feeling extremely proud
An old tune from years ago
Nothing to stop the show
I started singing that tune
Not being any kind of prune
Why this happened you may ask
It wasn’t anything from a flask
Though I have one excuse to acquit
The Coffee made me do it!

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Can Do Attitude

Gun Roswell's avatarRantings Of A Third Kind

“Let’s Call the Whole Thing Off” Ira and George Gershwin

Can Do Attitude

(This one is a must sing ;P)

You say neither, I say either
You say potato, I say tomato

Potato, tomato
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say sell, I say buy
You say it can’t be done
I say it will be fun

Oranges, apples
What the hell happened?
They don’t rhyme
I don’t mind
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say I’m boring
I say you snoring
You say it’s very bad
I say don’t be sad

Boring, snoring
“What the hell happened to this, song(?)?”
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say it’s a fake
I say a piece of cake
You say you’re such a jerk
I say it will work

Jerk, work
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say I’m obsessive
I say I’m positive
You prefer negative

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Can Do Attitude

“Let’s Call the Whole Thing Off” Ira and George Gershwin

Can Do Attitude

(This one is a must sing ;P)

You say neither, I say either
You say potato, I say tomato

Potato, tomato
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say sell, I say buy
You say it can’t be done
I say it will be fun

Oranges, apples
What the hell happened?
They don’t rhyme
I don’t mind
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say I’m boring
I say you snoring
You say it’s very bad
I say don’t be sad

Boring, snoring
“What the hell happened to this, song(?)?”
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say it’s a fake
I say a piece of cake
You say you’re such a jerk
I say it will work

Jerk, work
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say I’m obsessive
I say I’m positive
You prefer negative
I say my glass is full

“What?
You keep loosing the rhyme!”

“Oh, don’t be such a bore!”

“No, I’m just sore,
Because you keep singing off key!”

“Oh, please,
You are even worse, and don’t try to flee!”

Worse, off key
Let’s call the whole thing off

“OK, so let’s try this again one more time?”

“Fine! And this time make it rhyme!”

You say I like it plain
I say you aren’t quite sane
You say It’s not so simple
I say smile and get a dimple

Simple, dimple,
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say I’m going home
I say you don’t like it alone
You say let’s end this song
I say play the gong!

Song, gong
Let’s call the whole thing off

“So what now?
You’re just going to quit?”

“Yeah, that is the idea in ‘going home’, as in leaving!”

“So then, we must part?”

“Oh don’t me smart, have a heart!”

“Maybe try one more time, my way?”

“Like the song title or the highway?”

“No, with the positive attitude!”

“Without the platitude?”

“Fine?”

“Wine?”

*Snort!*

You say I like it here
I say I like everywhere
You say maybe we can
I say let’s can can!

Can, can, yes we can
Let’s call the calling off, off
Now!

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Life is a Musical (number)

“The world’s most famous and popular language is music” Psy

Life is a Musical (number)

Luck be a lady
Don’t be shady
Roll on those dice
Bring me nothing
But blue skies
Today

All day long
Singing along
Dancing, prancing
Even romancing
In the rain
Real life
Down the drain

Feels like
Witchcraft
Sorcery
No worries
Of groceries
When I’m riding
On this plane

All is fine
There is no time
To slow down
Get me to
Funky town

My life is
A musical
Today

musical