Black Friday Finland Style (Repost for Quote A Week Tuesday)

Posted on by

Posted in the Fabulous Friday series: “Black Friday Finland Style”
Humour, Dialogue, Poetry
In honour of the month of November

finland joke

“I hope your Black Friday injuries aren’t so severe that you can’t click a mouse on Cyber Monday.”

Black Friday Finland Style

darkness-2

“Bright light, bright light!”

“Oh my God, what is that?”

“Holy hell, is it a flying saucer?”

The masses had come out from their homes and workplaces staring and pointing up at the unidentified bright light high up in the sky. Some rumours had circulated, stating Finland had fallen under attack by UFOs.

In the corner of the street, a lonesome believer was preaching:

“The end of the world as we know it, is upon us!”
That day, was the first day of the month March.
Several months earlier

It was the beginning of October. The land had fallen under darkness. As if an evil warlock had cast a spell. Sour faces all around, no expressions, as if away blurred. Hardly any sound could be heard. People on the streets, dragging their feet. The lust for life, all sucked out.
First of March

An unidentified source of light had appeared in the skies.

“The sun”, someone said, as the onlookers stood before her, bewildered.

“It is called the sun” she stated again with a smile.

But the other just shook their heads in disbelief.

Still, turning their collective faces towards “the sun”. And, as by a wave of a magic wand, the crowd closed their eyes in unison and enjoyed that sacred moment. A collective sigh of content was the only sound heard.

For who knew, how long this would last…

darkness-1    darkness    darkness-3

darkness-4

light-1

light-2

Black Friday Finland Style

Posted on by

Posted in the Fabulous Friday series: “Black Friday Finland Style”
Humour, Dialogue, Poetry
In honour of the month of November

finland joke

“I hope your Black Friday injuries aren’t so severe that you can’t click a mouse on Cyber Monday.”

Black Friday Finland Style

darkness-2

 

“Bright light, bright light!”

“Oh my God, what is that?”

“Holy hell, is it a flying saucer?”

The masses had come out from their homes and workplaces staring and pointing up at the unidentified bright light high up in the sky. Some rumours had circulated, stating Finland had fallen under attack by UFOs.

In the corner of the street, a lonesome believer was preaching:

“The end of the world as we know it, is upon us!”
That day, was the first day of the month March.
Several months earlier

It was the beginning of October. The land had fallen under darkness. As if an evil warlock had cast a spell. Sour faces all around, no expressions, as if away blurred. Hardly any sound could be heard. People on the streets, dragging their feet. The lust for life, all sucked out.
First of March

An unidentified source of light had appeared in the skies.

“The sun”, someone said, as the onlookers stood before her, bewildered.

“It is called the sun” she stated again with a smile.

But the other just shook their heads in disbelief.

Still, turning their collective faces towards “the sun”. And, as by a wave of a magic wand, the crowd closed their eyes in unison and enjoyed that sacred moment. A collective sigh of content was the only sound heard.

For who knew, how long this would last…

darkness-1    darkness    darkness-3

darkness-4

light-1

light-2

Can Do Attitude (Repost for TBT)

Posted on by

fred 1

“Let’s Call the Whole Thing Off” Ira and George Gershwin

Can Do Attitude

(This one is a must sing ;P)

You say neither, I say either
You say potato, I say tomato

Potato, tomato
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say sell, I say buy
You say it can’t be done
I say it will be fun

Oranges, apples
What the hell happened?
They don’t rhyme
I don’t mind
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say I’m boring
I say you snoring
You say it’s very bad
I say don’t be sad

Boring, snoring
“What the hell happened to this, song(?)?”
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say it’s a fake
I say a piece of cake
You say you’re such a jerk
I say it will work

Jerk, work
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say I’m obsessive
I say I’m positive
You prefer negative
I say my glass is full

“What?
You keep loosing the rhyme!”

“Oh, don’t be such a bore!”

“No, I’m just sore,
Because you keep singing off key!”

“Oh, please,
You are even worse, and don’t try to flee!”

Worse, off key
Let’s call the whole thing off

“OK, so let’s try this again one more time?”

“Fine! And this time make it rhyme!”

You say I like it plain
I say you aren’t quite sane
You say It’s not so simple
I say smile and get a dimple

Simple, dimple,
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say I’m going home
I say you don’t like it alone
You say let’s end this song
I say play the gong!

Song, gong
Let’s call the whole thing off

“So what now?
You’re just going to quit?”

“Yeah, that is the idea in ‘going home’, as in leaving!”

“So then, we must part?”

“Oh don’t me smart, have a heart!”

“Maybe try one more time, my way?”

“Like the song title or the highway?”

“No, with the positive attitude!”

“Without the platitude?”

“Fine?”

“Wine?”

*Snort!*

You say I like it here
I say I like everywhere
You say maybe we can
I say let’s can can!

Can, can, yes we can
Let’s call the calling off, off
Now!

692F7428-B004-4533-8FE7-17C0CDD954AC_mw1024_s_n

Gun Roswell in Numbers (Writing 101, 2)

Posted on by

Free flow/Poetry/Dialogue mix
&
Writing 101, Day Two: Write a list

“Today, let’s write a list. Compiling a list is a way to let loose, unlock ideas, and free your mind”

Today, write your own list on one of these topics:

* Things I Like
* Things I’ve Learned
* Things I Wish

If you want to tackle a different genre:

* Fiction: Your character discovers a piece of paper, with a list on it, on the ground. What happens next?

* Poetry: Incorporate numbers into a poem, or focus your poem on things you like, wish for, or have learned.

2449_46_writing-quotes-pick-up-a-pen-and-write

“There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed” Ernest Hemingway

Gun Roswell in Numbers (Writing 101, 2)

Let’s do some simple arithmetic
To get this show started

When?

I was born in nineteen hundred and sixty-five (1965)
That would make me a total of five and zero (50)
Surely that is worth some kind of high five (your hand held high and clashing with someone else’s hand)
After all I may not be a super hero (is there a number for that?)
But certainly some kind of artist, but hardly a Miro

Oh, yeah, I wrote that in rhyme!
Hope you don’t mind?

Personally

My slender shoe size is forty-two (42)
In other languages that means eight (8) for the United Kingdom
And ten (10) for the United States
Basically that means I can use my shoes
For walking, running and as skis
All in one package kind of deal with a freedom
To do what ever, when ever, whom ever (oops! scratch the last one!)
Of course I still need a pair of … skates

My waist size?

Well let’s not go there this time (there really is no measurable number)
Just kidding: I *do* have big bones!
Something something measured in stones (oh, wait, that’s weight: never mind!)

Got a full chest of ninety five (95DD) double dee
Yeah, really! Nothing new here to see!

On my high heels standing tall at a hundred and seventy-one (171)
That is metric and loosely translates as five point six feet (5.6)
I can easily steal the spot in the sun
Especially when I am wearing my high heels

Creatively I have been a

Photographer since I was ten (10)
Subtracted from fifty (50) that means a total of forty (40) years
During that time, I have managed to snap pics of the Eiffel Tower and Big Ben
– Imagine that!
Maybe time to shift to some new gears?

I started writing at the ripe old age of five (5)
Subtracted from fifty (50) that means a total of forty-five (45) years

So sue me: There are too many fives and I am having a difficulty of finding rhymes!

Professionally

I had a lot of fun in customer service for sixteen (16) years
– Oh.My.God. Seriously? That is a reason for a few beers!
And lately, for the past twenty (20) odd years in the world of IT
– Yeah, you really think you are so clever and mighty? (don’t ya!)

Contact details

I live in the flat number 3 A 1 (that’s some kind of hexadecimal code, right?)
My postal code is 02650 (Total of 13, ah, the magical number!)
And you can call me at extension 566 4574 (note the 7 and 4: vice versa that makes 47)
I may answer your call or then again I might not

– Hey, this last one did not rhyme!
So?
– You promised rhyme, in the beginning, remember?
Did not!
– Did too!
Na-ah!

(angry staring contest continues, but this tale ends right here.)

-> OK, so this may not be a resume, just some shameless self promotion, that’s all!

gun

Related posts:
Forty-Seven 

More, Please!

Posted on by

more

“Please, sir, I want some more” Charles Dickens, Oliver Twist

More, Please

I hate it!
More?
Yes please

It’s disgusting and vile!
More?
Yes please

This tastes really bad!
More?
Yes please

I don’t like this series!
More?
Yes please

I have no fondness for this type of activity!
More?
Yes please

I am getting too old for this shit!
More?
Yes please

The flavour of this coffee is more like tar!
More?
Yes please

I have too many shoes already!
More?
Yes please

Life sucks!
More?
Yes please!moreismore

SL WEEK 15: Communications; Lesson in Water Guns

Posted on by

Photo Challenge by SYLVAIN LANDRY
A response to Sylvain’s challenge theme of communications
“Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something” Plato

SL WEEK 15: Communications; Lesson in Water Guns

“So listen carefully, because I shall say this only once”

Others nodding in unison.

“This is the safety, once you pull it back, you can shoot.”

Everyone staring in awe and with a bewildered look on their faces.

“You know what a safety is?”

“Um…” “Um” “No?”

“OK, I will show you one more time. Now watch and listen carefully!”

watergun

SL WEEK 15: Communications; Hot Gossip

Posted on by

Photo Challenge by SYLVAIN LANDRY
A response to Sylvain’s challenge theme of communications

comms1

“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place” George Bernard Shaw

SL WEEK 15: Communications; Hot Gossip

“Say what?”
“I was asking did you hear about Toddy?”
“What about Toddy?”
“I said Toddy got his back burnt badly and was taken to the hospital.”
“Oh, too much sun?”
“Sun?”
“Yes, sun. From laying on the beach?”
“No, I heard it was a cooking accident.”
“Cooking?”
“Yeah, apparently his sausages overboild!”

comms2

Can Do Attitude

Posted on by

Gun Roswell's avatarRantings Of A Third Kind

“Let’s Call the Whole Thing Off” Ira and George Gershwin

Can Do Attitude

(This one is a must sing ;P)

You say neither, I say either
You say potato, I say tomato

Potato, tomato
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say sell, I say buy
You say it can’t be done
I say it will be fun

Oranges, apples
What the hell happened?
They don’t rhyme
I don’t mind
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say I’m boring
I say you snoring
You say it’s very bad
I say don’t be sad

Boring, snoring
“What the hell happened to this, song(?)?”
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say it’s a fake
I say a piece of cake
You say you’re such a jerk
I say it will work

Jerk, work
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say I’m obsessive
I say I’m positive
You prefer negative

View original post 217 more words

Can Do Attitude

Posted on by

“Let’s Call the Whole Thing Off” Ira and George Gershwin

Can Do Attitude

(This one is a must sing ;P)

You say neither, I say either
You say potato, I say tomato

Potato, tomato
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say sell, I say buy
You say it can’t be done
I say it will be fun

Oranges, apples
What the hell happened?
They don’t rhyme
I don’t mind
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say I’m boring
I say you snoring
You say it’s very bad
I say don’t be sad

Boring, snoring
“What the hell happened to this, song(?)?”
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say it’s a fake
I say a piece of cake
You say you’re such a jerk
I say it will work

Jerk, work
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say I’m obsessive
I say I’m positive
You prefer negative
I say my glass is full

“What?
You keep loosing the rhyme!”

“Oh, don’t be such a bore!”

“No, I’m just sore,
Because you keep singing off key!”

“Oh, please,
You are even worse, and don’t try to flee!”

Worse, off key
Let’s call the whole thing off

“OK, so let’s try this again one more time?”

“Fine! And this time make it rhyme!”

You say I like it plain
I say you aren’t quite sane
You say It’s not so simple
I say smile and get a dimple

Simple, dimple,
Let’s call the whole thing off

You say I’m going home
I say you don’t like it alone
You say let’s end this song
I say play the gong!

Song, gong
Let’s call the whole thing off

“So what now?
You’re just going to quit?”

“Yeah, that is the idea in ‘going home’, as in leaving!”

“So then, we must part?”

“Oh don’t me smart, have a heart!”

“Maybe try one more time, my way?”

“Like the song title or the highway?”

“No, with the positive attitude!”

“Without the platitude?”

“Fine?”

“Wine?”

*Snort!*

You say I like it here
I say I like everywhere
You say maybe we can
I say let’s can can!

Can, can, yes we can
Let’s call the calling off, off
Now!

692F7428-B004-4533-8FE7-17C0CDD954AC_mw1024_s_n

Give and Take?

Posted on by

argument

 

“In a deal, you give and take. You compromise. Then you grab the cash and catch the next train out of town” Irving Paul Lazar

Give and Take?

I told you so, but you never listen!

A “conversation” between two people about everything and nothing as it may have happened.

“You are so thick headed aren’t you!”

“So I’m the one who is the bad guy again, huh?”

“Well you are. There is no arguing about that!”

“So you are blaming me about everything that has gone wrong?”

“Yes, what’s your point?”

“No point. It’s hilarious! You are hilarious!”

“So now you are saying I’m a joke? Is that it?”

“No, I said you must be joking.”

“That’s not what I heard.”

“Then there must be something wrong with your hearing.”

“So now you are complaining about my ability to understand you!”

“No, I said you understand things in your own way.”

“Are you calling me stupid? If you are I will show you stupid…!”

“Good grief! Read my lips: You are stubborn!”

“Just because I hear and understand something differently than you, that makes me stubborn?”

“Potato, tomato!”

“Are you mocking me?”

“No.”

“It sure sounded like you were.”

“You heard me wrong then!”

“Again with the hearing! I am not deaf you know!”

“What was the point?”

“What point?”

“Why are we arguing?”

“I dunno. The weather is not so good today?”

“No it’s not. The forecast promised sunshine tomorrow though.”

“Sounds good.”

“Yep.”

“Yep.”

“Ok then!”

“Yep.”

 

Sometimes an argument is just that. The words are not important. The point of it is, there was no point to begin with. A bad day can cause feelings to run amuck. Venting with someone you trust and then forgetting about it is cathartic.

Give-and-take-is-fair__quotes-by-English-Proverb-12