“Not today Satan! Not today.” Bianca Del Rio
Be careful what you wish for!
Not another rejection! I was getting sick and tired of working my respective derriere off and for what? For nothing, thank you very much. No matter what I wrote, how I wrote or how many submissions I sent in, all my work got rejected.
“I would make a deal with the devil if I would finally get a chance!” I shouted out loud in the empty room.
The lights flickered and all got dark.
“Oh hell, not another power outage again!” I tried to feel my way in the darkness, but as I moved around, I realized I wasn’t bumping into any kind of obstacles, like the furniture or scattered stuff lying on the floor in my room.
Then I could see a bright spot in the distance. By instinct I started walking towards the light. When I reached the light, I noticed I had actually been transported to some place completely different. The surroundings reminded vaguely of some of the cardboard sets from many a sci-fi film I had seen. The place was surrounded by a heavy mist, like someone had gone wild with a smoke machine. Luckily I had taken my asthma medicine earlier.
I walked around and wondered whether I was dreaming or abducted by some funky disco loving aliens.
“Hello! Anyone home?” I shouted.
Then wooshing sound and flash of light and, there she was, standing before me in a catsuit like leathery outfit. She looked at me, clearly assessing who and what I was.
“So you would like to be famous?” She asked me.
“Who are you?” I was a not sure whether this was a dream or I had been set up by Candid Camera.
“Beelzebub.” She answered.
“Come again?” What the f..k? I was thinking this definitely had to be a set up.
She looked at me annoyed.
“You know as in Old Nick, Lucifer, the Tempter, Prince of Darkness? Ring a bell for you?”
I shook my head.
“Satan!” She shouted out loud her voice echoing in the setting.
“Ah!” I finally got it, “What’s with the decoy? Why not come right in front and introduce yourself like “Hi, I am Satan, nice to meet you!” I asked trying to lighten the mood.
She, Satan stared at me and I got a little worried then. My skin was burning a little. For what ever reason, I wasn’t sure.
“I heard you were ready to deal.” Satan stated matter of factually.
“Maybe,” I tried nonchalantly not believing my luck! “What kind of deal did you have in mind?”
“Well I can make you rich and famous and all that entails as.. What was it again you said you were, a writer?”
“Yeah!” So, not all knowing after all, I thought.
“Writer. Yes, well I have several of those, but if that is what you want to be then who am I to argue.” Satan responded, looking at me eyes flaming.
“What exactly would it entail? The deal I mean?” My curiosity was peaked, but this sounded too good of a deal to really be true.
“Well do you think you are any good as a writer now?” Satan asked me.
Motioning my hand in comme ci comme ça -manner. “Meh?”
“Well, despite your short comings, I can make sure what ever word fall from your pen or what is it you humans are using now, keyboard?”
I nodded.
“I can make sure it’s all gold and you will become a renowned writer.”
I was really hooked now.
“What do I have to do?”
Another woosh sounded.
“Simply put on them red slippers and click your heels three times!” Satan pointed at the newly appeared footwear.
I was hesitant, red wasn’t really my colour.
“I don’t know. Can I see that in an other colour?”
I could see Satan’s eyes widen and sure, there was smoke coming out of her ears.
“You dare to contradict me?” She was furious.
Oh, oh. I had angered the devil, not good. I was worried I might loose the deal. And red was fine. I could always accessorize and buy a red bag, maybe a matching hat…
“Fine! Don’t get your knickers in a bunch! I will put the red slippers on, no problem!” I slipped the shoes on one by one and pointed at them: “See! Chill out Satan!”
She grinned wickedly: “Excellent! Now click your heels three times.”
“Seriously?” I asked. I thought I heard that line in a movie some place.
“Do as I damn well say!” Satan clearly had anger management issues.
“OK, I will. Look, I am doing it.”
And with that said, I clicked my heels, one, two, three times. The lights flickered again. Everything went dark.
“Not this again! Been there done that, now bring on the light!” I shouted in despair.
Then the lights came on. I was back in my, room?
It wasn’t my room, not at least the way I left it. It was a huge room with nice furniture and all kinds of gorgeous glittery things around. I looked around in awe. Where was I?
I noticed a newspaper on the table. I went to look to find more clues as to where and why. My heart skipped a beat. The headline stated “Premier for ‘Dancing with the Devil in the pale moonlight’ written by the famous author, Gun Roswell”
I glanced at my feet. And, I was still wearing the red slippers on my feet!
“You have to be careful what you wish for. What you think you want, may be more than you can handle!”
Rantings Of A Third Kind 