Door to Door Bus Service

Posted in the Daily Incidents series
Poetry, Tale, Humour & Photography
Photo credits Google and YLE

HSL BEST BUSS SERVICE

“Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down” Oprah Winfrey

Door to Door Bus Service

“The story you are about to hear is true.
Some of the names have been changed to protect the innocent.”

They say, Finland has one of the best public transportation networks in the world. But, who could have imagined such door to door delivery, and on a bus no less!

If it hails, rains, or storms
Just slam shut the car doors
Hike your way to the nearest bus stop
It’s easy as a skip and a hop

We are having the worst weather in Finland currently. Iced roads due to rain upon melted snow and rapid temperature rises from minus 28 degrees to + 2 degrees Celsius. This is causing what we Finns refer to as “skull weather” or in Finnish: “Pääkallokeli”. Yes, I know what you think; they have cold and snow there all year around. One could imagine they had gotten used to it and perfected the vehicles to run according. Alas no: Each year the snow “surprises” the drivers, train gears are frozen and heavy transports such as trucks and buses run amok on the roads.

Yesterday, this story on the news broke, regarding a bus hitting the wall of a building. Luckily the whole incident was managed with only a few minor injuries and some plaster off the wall!

In general us Finns are a no-nonsense no small talk people and we like to keep things on the factual level only. Our firemen are top of the line professionals and as we found out, in this case none the less so.

The reporter on site was interviewing the lead fireman, who was responding in his unique professional no-nonsense way.

The Fireman:
“We have five units on site. The injured parties have been taken to the hospital. The bus hit the building wall. The police is investigating the accident.”

The reporter:
“Who were injured?”

The fireman looking at the reporter in a “duh” way:
“The passengers.”
He then replied curtly.

End transmission.

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Down the Hill (Daily Photo)

Posted in the Daily Photo series
Poetry, Tale, Humour & Photography

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“A society that gets rid of all its troublemakers goes downhill” Robert A. Heinlein

Down the Hill (Daily Photo)

When ever there is snow on the ground
And a small mountain or a molehill found
The kids will arrive in flocks
Dragging their sleighs to the top
“Mommy, mommy, look at me!
Look how fast I am going!
Oops, look, there’s a tree!”

<Crash, bang, boing>

“Mommy, mommy, look no teeth!”
The kid only laughingly stated
As back up hill he ventured
If only to once more ride
Before getting his dentures

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Manic Monday? (Daily Photo), Part Two

Posted in the Daily Photo series
Poetry, Tale & Photography 

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“It’s just another Manic Monday” The Bangles

Manic Monday? (Daily Photo) Two

Is this another Manic Monday?
Or just another January Fun-day?

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Manic Monday? (Daily Photo), Part One

Posted in the Daily Photo series
Poetry, Tale & Photography 

 

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“It’s just another Manic Monday” The Bangles

Manic Monday? (Daily Photo) One

Is this another Manic Monday?
Or just another January Fun-day?



It’s six o’clock already, but I need to drive steady. The roads are iced and if I drive too fast, I will get sliced. As usual, after the weekend, Monday follows and so does the mania and the panic. Rushing here and rushing there. A never ending story of this writer’s life. Or does it apply to everyone?

Just when I thought it was safe to say, it’s going to be a peaceful day, all hell breaks loose. So who cooked the goose this time? All was fine, for a moment at least, but someone unleashed the beast. And yet again, another fire to fight! Ah this poor girl’s plight.

Several hours later, when once again, I have turned into a hater, of Mondays, the sun has come out to play! I’m secretely hoping it is here to stay! I rush out, leaving my gloves and coat behind. Never mind! The air is much warmer now. After all, only minus degrees of two, so what have I got to loose!

Reaching the seashore, the sunrise to score. Enjoying a few seconds, because the sun beckoned and then… it hits me. The coldest of winds, blowing in my face. Oh how I really hate… Winter! GRRRR.

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Let the rantings begin! (Repost for 1 Year Anniversary)

Posted in Achievements, Anniversary

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“All the best laid plans…”

Let the rantings begin!

The old adage ‘Life is something, that happens when you are busy making other plans’ applies in most situations. Whether it is something you planned for the day or a bigger plan like your career from the time you finished school and started work life, the one thing you can be sure of is that nothing will go exactly the way you planned.

Rather than dwelling on the bigger plan, I would like to share some of the day-to-day experiences and how the adage ‘Well begun is half done’ does not always add up!

Sometimes something as simple as buying groceries may end up being a little more than you bargained for…

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A quick trip to the supermarket

I had planned to do my shopping for the week and finish working early to avoid the rush hour. Unfortunately my boss had other ideas: A rush job, which needed to be done urgently, today.

So, I changed my plans and stayed late. Guess my boss was the one with the bigger plan this time.

When I finally managed to sneak out, I got into my car and drove into the street. I had arrived just in time for the traffic jam! An endless sea of cars back to back with no way in or out from the roundabout. Well, I did not get to go to the carnival last time they were in town, so guess I could enjoy myself in a merry-go-round for a while, listening to my favourite tunes on the radio.

After a while the traffic had hardly moved an inch since I joined and the music station was more talk than tunes. Guess the radio station had the bigger plan this time.

I finally arrived at the supermarket after driving in a back-to-back traffic for much longer than I had planned to and was running late.

Now it was time for plan B: Park the car, get in and out from the store as quickly as possible and shop only what was on my well planned shopping list!

There were a few hick-ups in that plan: The car park was jammed and after circling it for the third or fourth time, I managed to get in time to queue in to a spot when another car was leaving. Secondly, all the shopping trolleys were in use.

While looking around I managed to find one standing there all by its lonesome. I soon found out why: When I pushed the trolley trying to move it to the right, the trolley went the opposite direction. Lastly, I had forgotten the well-planned shopping list on the kitchen table while leaving to work in a hurry when a well-planned morning had failed due to an unplanned phone call.

Best laid plans and all…

I finally got inside the store and was now moving towards the section where they sold the “home made cooking” type meals. I could already taste a well-grilled chicken in my mouth and made plans in my head on how to accessorize the dish. When it was my turn at the counter, and with a big grin made a request to purchase the chicken, there was nothing left but pork.

And so it was time for plan C: Go to the frozen food section and choose a chicken pizza.

After shopping was done and I had maneuvered my way out through the crowds of shoppers with my rickety trolley I finally reached the cash register. The customer before me put something on the conveyor belt that immediately caught my eye: ‘Closed, please move on to the next available register‘.

And then it was time for plan D. I moved to another register at the end of a very long line.

I was finally done with my shopping and heading towards the escalator on my way down to the parking lot. When I reached it, I noticed people pushing and pulling, some even lifting their trolleys. The reason was soon revealed to me, the escalator had stopped working and people were jammed in it and trying their hardest to get forward on the sticky non-moving machine.

So it was time for plan E: Take the lift.

After queuing for a lift ride for much longer than anticipated, I finally managed to get to my car, drive home and eat my frozen pizza. Did not enjoy it as much as I would have a well-cooked meal, but I was well-fed and ready to start planning my next day.

The lesson learned here is, you don’t always have to have a plan or be prepared for every situation. Live a little and remember that sometimes it’s good to just go with the flow.

As for myself, I still keep making my everyday plans!

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Caturday, 2016-01-16

In honour of Caturday, for all cats everywhere

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“A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere” Groucho Marx

Caturday, 2016-01-16

When the black cat
Was crossing the street
She was chasing a rat
Trying to act discreet
Hiding behind a big hat
Awaiting her treat

The grounded bat
Knew he tasted sweet
Stood still on the mat
There was no time to greet
Only time, for combat

After a long while
Both standing still
Trying to act hostile
But without thrill
So instead of the usual
They decided in mutual

This tale’s end
Will the norm bend
Cat and mouse decided
To shake their paws delighted
The lesson of this tale?
Sometimes it’s good to fail

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Service or no Service, That is the Question (Repost for TBT)

Posted in the Throwback Thursday Series
Poetry, photography, tales and things that nature!

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“Someone calling oneself a customer says 
she wants something called service?”

Service or no Service, That is the Question

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Those of us who work in the field of Information Technology know very well, that nothing is as certain: If something can go wrong, it will go wrong, especially when you least expect it. Oddly enough, the supposedly most reliable functionality used on daily bases tends to break down most frequently.

This is also true for any IT related appliances. Then you realize you need to call for help. But sometimes it seems getting the support for the actual issue at hand can be difficult at best.

For your amusement, a telecommunication between a PC Help Desk agent and the end user as it may have happened in real life:

“PC Service Desk, how may I help you today?”

“Hello, Yes, I have a problem with my emails, it seems I cannot send any.”

“I see. Would you be able to answer a few basic questions before we can start troubleshooting your issue?”

“Yes of course, fire away!”

“Thank you Ma’am. First question: Have you been diagnosed with any kind of debilitating disorder?”

“Umm… no.”

“Good. Next question: Are you currently experiencing nausea, dizziness, headache or dryness of the mouth?”

“No?”

“OK. Moving on: Do you feel numbness or swelling in any of your extremities?”

“No!”

“Are you currently on any kind of medication?”

* Getting annoyed *

“What has any of this got to do with my issue with email?”

“Just answer the questions Ma’am so we may move on!”

“Fine! I took some antihistamine this morning.”

“I see. Would you mind if we establish a link to your PC?”

“No of course not, please do!”

“Excellent. When you see the pop-up window, just click on the ‘accept’ choice”

“Done”

* A window with a face of the Help Desk person appears on the PC screen *

“Can you see me Ma’am?”

“Yes I see you clearly.”

“Great, we can see you as well.”

“OK, so now can we get back to my issue?”

“Hold on Ma’am. Can you stand up?”

“What?”

“Please stand up!”

“OK, standing up!”

“Now, please walk a few meters in a straight line to your left, then back to your right”

* Shaking head but complying *

“Walking…”

“Perfect. Now, stand perfectly still, move your right hand to the tip of your nose and back down again.”

* Frustrated sigh *

“OK…”

“Fine, now please do the same with your left hand.”

* Requested activity completed *

“Excellent Ma’am! We are all done here. Thank you for your co-operation and calling our emergency service desk! Have an excellent day!”

“What the… hold on! What of my issue with the email?”

“HAVE A GREAT DAY MA’AM! Goodbye!”

“But.. OK, Bye!”

* Sighing hevily *

* Looking around the office for colleagues *

“Does anyone else have an issue with their email?”

“Yes!”
“Me too!”
“Yup!”
“Diddo!”

“Did any of you call the help desk?”

“NO!”
“Never!”
“Not me!”
“Not in a million years!”

Saying out loud: “OK, then! Guess it’s back to work!”

Thinking: ‘Guess I just have to fix the issue myself!’

Lesson learned: “Self service is the best service!”

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A Christmas Tale: Can I have some Figgy Puddin’, please!

Holiday celebration (Christmas season)

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times” Charles Dickens

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A Christmas Tale: Can I have some Figgy Puddin’, please!

The year was 1845. I was about ten years of age and working as a stable girl. Our family lived and worked in Lord Hamilton’s manor house. It was Christmas time and as a gift for the servants, the Lord arranged a feast for the staff and their families.

Mommy had the children dressed in their Sunday best. My two brothers were complaining about the stiffness of the shirts. Starch was itchy and could cause rash, especially if one scratched the itch.
I had my favourite dress on and my younger sister was a bit jealous of the red and green colouring. She was wearing a plain blue coloured hand me down.

After all the fuzz and hassle with the wardrobe, the whole family was finally set to go to the main house and start with the Christmas dinner. Us servants would be dining in the large kitchen. Several long tables were brought in with extra seats as well. This wasn’t a large household. With around fifteen servants and their families, well not all had children and spouses, all in all around sixty people in total crammed around the tables. The two cooks had had their hands full with the preparations and naturally every one that could had chipped in.

But now it was time for celebration. Everyone was finally sitting down and getting quiet. After grace the noise level rose again. Food containers were passed around and everyone was filling their respective plates. After all, it wasn’t often we got to eat in this manner and variety.

After a while, everyone had cleared their plates and it was time for dessert. My favourite was the Figgy Pudding. If possible I opted for seconds. As I got my plate of the delicious substance before me, I licked my lips and dug into it with gusto. It did not take too long for the food to disappear from my plate.

My mom looked at me with a smirk. I looked back at her and passing my bowl I asked: “Is there any Figgy Puddin’ left?”

I was smiling widely, feeling exhilarated, when the bowl was passed back to me with an other helping.

When the final bits were eaten, it was time for the traditional sing along. The farmhand brought out his accordion and after the first few tunes, we all joined in. The evening was spent singing, chatting and finally picking up the tables. We all went back to our dwellings, thanking the Lord for the special meal.

Merry Pudding and God bless us everyone!

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Happy Holidays and A Very Merry Xmas to One and All!

Holiday celebration (Christmas season)

“How did it get so late so soon? It’s night before its afternoon. December is here before it’s June. My goodness how the time has flown. How did it get so late so soon?” Dr. Seuss

Happy Holidays and A Very Merry Xmas to One and All!

‘Twas the night before Christmas
Nothing stirred,
No sound was heard
No human, nor animal, in sight
Even the mice had taken flight
The only ones about their business
Were the little green men from Mars
They had to be really careful
Their nature a little bit fearful
For the holidays not to turn into a farce
It was their turn to spread wholly
Presents and a great amounts of jolly

In a mighty hurry
No time for blurry
Their sleigh filled
Up to the hilt
As it took off
With a big bang
And a huge puff
As they all sang
The yuletide carols
As they rolled off

Children and grown-ups
Getting lots of stuff
As the little green men
Working collectively
Their derrières off in zen
As the Xmas spirit
Now duly delivered
All around the world
At least,
That is what we heard

mr, mrs claus

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Some Social Media Bullshit (Repost for Blogging 201)

‘Connecting people – The artist formerly known as Nokia’

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Some Social Media Bullshit

You don’t have to like it, but have to be in there: The social media of the world wide web. After all, who wants to be a complete social outcast!

Here are a few examples of what can be used for keeping in touch with family, friends and even your favourite movie stars!

* Assbook: Like opinions, everyone has more than one
* Angstagram: I post photos of myself and my eating habits, therefore I am
* Bitter: You would be too if no one is following you, right?
* Benchpress: For every self aware blabber, but more artistic ;P
* Tiedup: A must for professionals, endorse endorse endorse until you drop!
* You-boob: You did something stupid, maybe flashed a body part usually hidden, it got on video and uploaded on the internet and now you are the star of your own show!

A typical modern person’s day

@In the morning
The alarm clock is going off, it’s time to get up.
What is the first thing you do?

#Pick up your phone from the night stand and:

A) Check your social media apps
B) Check your email

@Driving in the car to your place of work.
Listening to the radio and the DJ is urging you to snap a photo and upload it to their site:

#uploadfunnypic

A) You are snapping selfies and almost bumping into the car that stopped in front of you. (The other driver possibly doing the same thing as you).
B) You are twatting your social media buddies of what you just did.

@Lunch time everyone with their phones in their respective hands. Not one word is spoken to anyone ‘live’, but they all are:

A) Chatting (and oh yes, there are actually office use approved ones too: Yank!)
B) Updating statuses on various social media apps.
C) Uploading photos of what they ate (of course, a must for every self aware social medialite).
D) Someone shared a funny video and twatted the link to everyone else around the table.
E) Everyone watching the video.
F) Everyone twatting feedback to each other.

@Coffee break everyone is:

A) Uploading photos of coffee and doughnuts they will consume.
B) Chatting with the people around the coffee table.

Back home from the office.

@Dinner table the family is sharing a meal and their respective day:

A-F apply here too.

@Midnight, bedtime:

A) Time to recap today’s event in your “blab”.
B) Latest friend updates to be checked (so not to miss any important things such as what your friends ate or what they were watching on TV, etc.)
C) Twatting everyone

#g’night!

Sometimes though, you have to be more low tech. For example in the situation, where your respective spouse is not quite on the same level of enlightenment regarding the social conventions of the social media as you are. Then you have to resort to archaic methods like the SMS.

Wishing your spouse

#sweet dreams xoxo

Lesson learnt:
Getting anything done; 3% is talent, 97% is staying off the internet.

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