Time to check whether it’s real or memorex

“It is strange because sometimes, I read a book, and I think I am the people in the book”

So there I was, in the middle of the woods, all by my lonesome. No where to hide, no where to run.
I was in for a challenge. Not only because of me detoxing from the fiction I was greatly hooked up on at this point, but also living in an archaic house without any creature comforts.

I watched the car drive off, and then I was finally alone. Time to start the battle with the demons!
I went inside the wooden cabin finding a layer of dust settling on the surfaces. Sighing deeply and thinking ‘Welcome to the labour camp’. Placing my rucksack on the chair closest to me, I rolled up my sleeves and started cleaning up.

Windows and door open to get the air circulating. Making do with an old broom to swipe the floors. Luckily I had brought some cleaning wipes with me. Those would come in handy while dusting the surfaces.

A few hours later I looked around and the place was spick and span clean. It was time for the evening meal and I was unpacking my bag. I had several cans of food, some crackers and a juice canister. Now all I needed was water and wood!

The rest of my day went pretty much doing chors like cutting wood and hauling water from the well.
A few more hours went by and I was inside getting the wooden stow started. When the fire was burning nicely, I opened one of the cans, pea soup of course, good for any camper!

It was night fall and I had my little oil lamp burning and the fire was going keeping me warm. It had been a little bit of an effort, but luckily some smart Alec had written instructions now hanging on the wall next to fireplace.

So there I was without a care in the world, my stomach full with soup and juice. I was wondering how people managed to get anything else done in the olden days. Most of the daylight hours seemed to be wasted on cleaning and gathering necessities for meal preparation.

Then I realized I needed to use the facilities. Unfortunately there was only an outhouse and it was a bit tricky to navigate there in the dark. I had my torch with me so that helped a little. I just hoped no wildlife were close by feeling peckish and thinking I was food.

The routine for the two week period was pretty much the same every day. Get up at dawn, because the birds were screaming in the trees, hunt and gather for nourishment. The cottage grounds actually had a pretty good assortment of various berries and luckily it was the season for most of them.

In the end, I did not even miss reading, anything, fiction or otherwise. I didn’t have time, when the real life hit me hard, and using a log to do it!

Let’s see what happens when I finally get back home, where all the temptations await me!

Some Social Media Bullshit Like That

‘Connecting people – The artist formerly known as Nokia’

“Are we really connected?” Gun Roswell

You don’t have to like it, but have to be in there: The social media of the world wide web. After all, who wants to be a complete social outcast!

Here are a few examples of what can be used for keeping in touch with family, friends and even your favourite movie stars!

* Assbook: Like opinions, everyone has more than one
* Angstagram: I post photos of myself and my eating habits, therefore I am
* Bitter: You would be too if no one is following you, right?
* Benchpress: For every self aware blabber, but more artistic ;P
* Tiedup: A must for professionals, endorse endorse endorse until you drop!
* You-boob: You did something stupid, maybe flashed a body part usually hidden, it got on video and uploaded on the internet and now you are the star of your own show!

A typical modern person’s day 

@In the morning
The alarm clock is going off, it’s time to get up.
What is the first thing you do?

#Pick up your phone from the night stand and:

A) Check your social media apps
B) Check your email

@Driving in the car to your place of work.
Listening to the radio and the DJ is urging you to snap a photo and upload it to their site:

#uploadfunnypic

A) You are snapping selfies and almost bumping into the car that stopped in front of you. (The other driver possibly doing the same thing as you).
B) You are twatting your social media buddies of what you just did.

@Lunch time everyone with their phones in their respective hands. Not one word is spoken to anyone ‘live’, but they all are:

A) Chatting (and oh yes, there are actually office use approved ones too: Yank!)
B) Updating statuses on various social media apps.
C) Uploading photos of what they ate (of course, a must for every self aware social medialite).
D) Someone shared a funny video and twatted the link to everyone else around the table.
E) Everyone watching the video.
F) Everyone twatting feedback to each other.

@Coffee break everyone is:

A) Uploading photos of coffee and doughnuts they will consume.
B) Chatting with the people around the coffee table.

Back home from the office.

@Dinner table the family is sharing a meal and their respective day:

A-F apply here too.

@Midnight, bedtime:

A) Time to recap today’s event in your “blab”.
B) Latest friend updates to be checked (so not to miss any important things such as what your friends ate or what they were watching on TV, etc.)
C) Twatting everyone

#g’night!

Sometimes though, you have to be more low tech. For example in the situation, where your respective spouse is not quite on the same level of enlightenment regarding the social conventions of the social media as you are. Then you have to resort to archaic methods like the SMS.

Wishing your spouse

#sweet dreams xoxo

Lesson learnt:
Getting anything done; 3% is talent, 97% is staying off the internet.

The Truth, Is Out There, Maybe?

“Looking for the truth, or just, looking?” Gun Roswell

In
My Mind

Science Fiction
Science Fact
Utopia

The Earth
The Planets
The Stars

In
My Mind

A Galaxy
The Milky Way
The Cosmos

The Universe
The Intergalactic Space
A Void

In
My Mind

A Wormhole
A Black hole
A Singularity

Pi
A mathematical constant
The number 47
A mystery

In
My Mind

Spiraling
With random thoughts
With coherent thoughts

Universes and Worlds
Conjured up and destroyed

In
My Mind

Aliens and
Their spaceships

Humans with
Their flying machines

In the Here
And Now

I am
Peddling
On my Bicycle
The long dark road
A head of Me

Tuesday? Once a week only?

It’s another day of the week, naturally!” Gun Roswell

The days come along one by one (usually the way they do)
It’s almost like singing a song (verse by verse moving along)
Today it’s Tuesday, when only yesterday it was Sunday (that’s how I recall it)
And now, it’s getting late, no matter how I hesitate, tomorrow will be here, I can feel it near (What do you know: It’s Wednesday and midweek, what a geek!)

Guess I need to stop worrying about Mondays anyway (Oh, did you worry before? Did not know that…)
Since the days keep on changing without my aid (Yeah, need a time machine for that!)
Why worry about some day, when there is always the next day (True, do like the Spanish do, manana!)
So, on this day of …ahem, Tuesday, I swear, not to worry about another damned day!!! (Liar! You know this promise or what ever is as good as the up and down going fever! You will never keep it, trust me, I know shit!)

Bring it on Tuesday, Wednesday and even Friday (Don’t forget Monday and something else!)
Every day, from this day on is my day (note to writer, how many times can you get away with the word “day”?)
I will start appreciating the here and now (Yeah, really! Like to see that)
And then, if not, nobody have a cow! (We already did! It’s there in the backyard!)

The Lemons of Life 

“When life gives you lemons, peel one up and eat it like the sourpuss you are, a quick fix huh? ” Gun Roswell 

Sour said the fox of the grapes
As it did not like the funky taste 

It’s far too hot outside right now
But then again, yesterday it snowed 

My face is too ugly for television they said
So why not try getting a job in radio instead 

I’m constantly worried of every little thing
But taking a shower makes me wanna sing 

When life gives you lemonades
Take them back to the store to exchange 

The Cat, a contemplating on, Life

The cat sitting in the middle of the street? Well? It can mean several things really – waiting, wasting time, contemplating life, or just sitting, just because they can” Gun Roswell

The cat who sat, in the middle of the street, someone even pleading, for them to move away, as traffic would most likely cause some dismay, alas, the cat who there calmly sat, could not have cared any less, because they had a bigger plan, the bigger picture to see, because this was no ordinary cat, whom simply on the streets sat, rather someone with many philosophical thoughts, their mind in a constant swirl of all the things in there hurled, thinking about life, the passersby, even the faint smiles given to them on a few occasion, and so, without moving much, the cat who on the street sat, kept on plotting and planning, the life as we know it scanning, taking serious notes, and then posting those, in the galactic wide board, for the rest of the life forms, to make a note of, a warning of sorts, of what the Hoomans of the blue globe, were doing, without any kind of good form.

The cat sure has an attitude!


“Cats with attitudes, well that certainly is special!!!” Gun Roswell

The cat in front of me did strut 

As if waiting for sim kind of  major debut

Staring, glaring, daring, her eyes totally flaring 

As if, she for what ever reason had completely had enough 

“Wassa matta?” 

I simply asked, not sure what this incident had now tasked 

Because I knew for certain that the fact 

Of food and water in the bowls were still intact 

But she kept on staring at me

As if hypnotising was the on remaining to be

For everything else she had already gotten 

My house, my bed, my servitude for only her spoken

“What more do you need?” 

I know I sounded desperate not smart 

The staring contest clearly lost on my part

She kept on going for a moment longer

Then, without further ado she parted, knowing well she was the stronger

And a cat with a attitude at that

Footfalls in my woolen socks

“Sometimes, it’s good to forget, the worries, the daily grind, even the shoes and simply stroll out there, into the freshly fallen snow, in only, woolen socks.” Gun Roswell

There are no missteps
Just follow my footsteps
And you may find
A reward of a different kind..
…A pair of woolen socks

Aliens, ate my tarts!

“Baking some nice pastries, for the sweet tooth on a Saturday noon, then finding out, how those turned out in the oven, is a whole other matter“ Gun Roswell

aliens ate my tarts

When the hunger for something sweet beckons, and to the freezer beckons, searching for some ingredients to whip up something real quick, before getting totally sick and delirious when the craving gets too much and such so then, finally finding some old and thankfully not yet mouldy supplies, putting them to getter for a few sweet pies. Shoving the lot into the oven and hoping the heck something of them coming out, a tasty treat for me to snack on, and in no time at all, the ding of the clock, indicating it is done, and so, it’s only a matter of moments before the treats are good and ready to eat.

Turning my back for mere moments, just enough time to make some coffee to go along with it and then ready with the dark liquid to pick up those sweet treats and what do I find? All of them gone, gone, gone! Nothing left except the face like a calling card of sorts. And when I looked at it I could clearly see, as to whom was the thief of my supposed tasty treats – Those darned aliens! They damned well ate all my sweet tarts!

The New Year has arrived !

“Another worthless year behind me in which I’d accomplished absolutely nothing!” Gun Roswell

Somehow, managed to muddle through real life, work and family

And for that I had an extra kind of remedy

Getting totally lost in the very land of, fantasy

And staying there for as long as possible

Watch so many favourite shows during the year

Over and over and over, without any fear

The familiar episodes bringing tears but also joy

And that my dear readers, was indeed the ploy!

Managed to output some things too

Stories, articles, poetry accumulating but a few

Over six-hundred-k words typed with bleeding fingers

But seeing someone cheering out there, sent me good shivers

People a few, really good ones too, did I meet

Not that socialising was the thing I was out there to seek?

Becoming somewhat of a hermit, a recluse, pardon the excuse

Of a certain viral strain raising havoc across the plains

Managed to get a few great friends 

And over the internets no less!

We may never see each other face to face

But hey, as long as we share our favourites

That is all I really for the daily grind need

And so, without a doubt:
Happy New Year, just the same!